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Enneagram

Relationship between type 4 and type 5

The artist and the observer

Éponine (Les Misérables)
Sherlock Holmes (Sherlock)

Attraction

4 is attracted to 5’s awareness, intellectual curiosity, analytical skills and thoughts.
5 is attracted to 4’s emotional depth, creativity, open-mindedness and ability to hold deep conversations.
Both are individualistic, like using their imagination and have a deep interest in the meaning of things.
4 can develop new interests by 5 sharing his thoughts on all the different topics that interest him, and 4 can help 5 explore his internal emotions.

Points where to be careful

4 can struggle with 5’s emotional detachment because he needs to feel deeply emotionally connected with his partner.
Thus, 4 can feel that 5 is too detached, unavailable, indifferent and cold.
5 can find 4 to be too emotional, attention-seeking, depressed, dramatic and difficult to please.